I am so tired of how we treat young girls when it comes to relationships. Having conquered my teenage years and now living in these young adult years, I come face-to-face with this on a regular basis, whether personally or through a friend – When a guy decides he likes a girl, everyone expects her to return that affection.

GIRL, YOU DO NOT HAVE TO LIKE HIM BACK.

Just because this guy has decided you are his flavor of the week does not require you to return his affection. I can assure you that unless he is incredibly persistent, he will have moved on down his list and completely “healed from his heartbreak” by next week.

I cannot count how many times I have had the following statements said to me, or witnessed other girls being told similar things:

“_____ likes you, so you need to like him back”

“You and _____ are such great friends and it’s obvious he likes you, so why don’t you like him back?” 

“Don’t hurt his feelings. If he asks you out you need to say yes.” 

“You won’t ever get married if you turn down every guy that asks you on a date.” 

“Even if you don’t like him just go on the date. At least, you’ll get a free meal out of it.” 

IM SORRY. 

EXCUSE ME. 

HOLD IT RIGHT THERE. 

BACK UP A SECOND.

I am my own person. 

I am not required to reciprocate feelings for every person who likes me. 

I am not obligated to date every guy who asks me out.

I am not out to take advantage of someone else’s emotions for my own gain.

Listen, Ladies: Just because he asks, does not mean you have to say yes. Just because everyone else thinks its a great idea, does not mean you have to go along with it. Do not give someone that amount of power over you.

If you have a little voice in the back of your head advising you against entering into a relationship with that person, that is the Holy Spirit and He deserves your attention. Listen to Him. Obey Him. I promise you won’t regret it in the long run.

We should not be encouraging our young girls to take advantage of a guy’s emotions just for a free meal and a fun time. Now, I know a date does not always mean a relationship will follow, but taking that first step will get his hopes up and allow him into a place of your heart that he may not deserve to have.

NEWSFLASH: Male’s have emotions too and should be treated with the same love and care girl’s expect to receive.

If a guy has taken a chance and declared his feelings for you, don’t be a jerk. But if you don’t feel the same way, you can politely decline without being rude. These are your brother’s in Christ and you should treat them with respect, love, and honor. 

Girl, take control of your life.

Do not allow just any person to speak into your life and make decisions for you. They may be a wise person, but only God knows your future – unless, you know, those rare times when He decides to tell somebody else before He tells you… but that is the exception NOT the rule.

Just because you are great friends does not mean you are intended to be romantically involved. God places people in our life that teach us and show us who and what we do and do not want in a future spouse. Take heed of the guidance of discernment you have been given. Become the woman God has created you to be.

And remember, you are not required to like him back, regardless of what everyone else may be saying or pressuring you to do.